Mentors and Flashbacks of my Childhood

I am applying to a volunteer program in my community that is similar to the "Big Brother, Big Sister" program. We are matched up with a youth and we spend three hours together once a week for an entire year.

There are a few reasons I have decided to do this.

1) Having worked for a year and half, I have a better feel for my job, and feel that this is something that I can and want to work into my schedule.

2) I had a lot of good mentors growing up, and they have set me on the path that has brought me to where I am today.

3) I think that everyone can use a good mentor.

4) Kids are bombarded with so many different messages from media every day, that its good to have someone who is real, and ready to share with them their experiences.

5) I truly believe that education is the best gift you can give to yourself. It opens up opportunities that are endless. I want to encourage this thought to the future of tomorrow.

6) I already am a real big sister. I have two little sisters, and since they are all grown up, I can now have another mentee (aka victim).

As a kid, my mentors growing up are my parents and my teachers. For a very long time, I always felt like the awkward kid in class, but I remember my teachers always saw the potential in me.

Even though I was born in Toronto, my family spoke Cantonese at home, and I hardly knew any English when I started kindergarten. I was enrolled in English as a Second Language (ESL) programs until I was in grade 3. I remember kids in my class would make fun of me and call me names like "ching chong."

My mom was always very strict with my school work, and would make sure that my sisters and I were on top of our homework. She would assign additional homework, since she didn't think that we got enough from school. I quickly became the "brainer" in my class, and was also teased and made fun of. "Brainiac" or "smarty pants."

I wore glasses and had bad acne from grade 7 to grade 10, I can assure you that I felt very unattractive for what felt like forever. I'm sure that no boy ever liked me because of this, and I was always afraid to admit (except to my close group of friends) which boy I liked, for fear of the boy reacting with "Ewwwww. Des likes me!"

For anyone who has ever suffered from acne, it's a terrible thing. And even though, it looks bad on the outside, it feels worse on the inside. I had very low self esteem, and I remember wanting to just sleep until it went away. I couldn't even imagine myself without it. Would I finally be pretty without acne?

I started seeing a dermatologist in grade 10, and eventually my acne went away. I started to feel a bit better about how I looked, but I was still very shy and reserved. I was sure that no boy would still like me. I always convinced myself that I would concentrate on school first, and everything else second.

I had great high school teachers whom I still think of today for helping me get where I am today.

Ms. D - She was my teacher for grade 11 and Calculus. She was a wonderful teacher who really cared about her students. She encourages myself and other young women to take control of our financial future, and start saving and investing in our future. I wish that I had listened to her in grade 12, but I guess it's never too lateputting those thoughts to actions.

Ms. C - It was in her class that I learned to combine class lectures with text books stuff. I also learned to ask for help when I needed it. A lot of kids in my class didn't like her because she was tough, and gave her a hard time. Bullying could happen to anyone and it is never acceptable.

Mr. S - He used to be a student at my high school and was a complete genius. He went off to university on a full scholarship, and became a published researcher during his graduate studies. He decided that this wasn't the thing for him, and pursued a teaching degree and started doing what he loved - teaching high school physics. He would make up crazy, entertaining test questions involving Gingerbreadman and Secret Agent 001 (himself), and do fun projects in class.

In high school, I worked part time on weekends at McDonald's and saved every penny towards college tuition. I also tutored several nights a week for classmates, younger students, etc, and pu that money towards my college tuition fund. My parents are poor, and I was scared shitless that I wouldn't have enough money to go to school, and have to work my entire life at a dead end job.

After working for 3 summers, all my part time work combined, I saved about $14,000. Enough to cover me for 1 year! I applied to an engineering school with a Co-op program which allowed me to alternate 4 months of school with 4 months of work after my first year. My work terms were also a great opportunity to sample various civil engineer fields.

College was a great time for me. It wasn't just the schooling, but meeting so many new people who are also like me. They might have been the "nerds" in their class, and been teased the same way I was for being "smart" or wearing glasses. The classes were definitely more challenging, and I was learning all the math and physics I could possible want (my 2 favourite subjects in high school!).

I am very lucky to have been touched by so many mentors. I hope that through my volunteer work, I can be a good mentor to a little girl with some big dreams. And share with her some of my experiences and help her reach her dreams.

Performance Review

It went well!

My manager thinks that I will be ready for a promotion very soon. I am excited to be taking on more responsibility, learning new things and earning more money.

I've been working for a year and a half now. I feel very thankful for still having a job during these tough economic times, and having a job that I look forward to.

Talking to my manager about my future, I start to feel more like a career woman. I no longer feel like a student, and I am thinking more long terms towards what I would like to be doing. It's both an exciting feeling, and a bit overwhelming.

It's funny, when I was little, my parents always were very strict with me regarding my studies. They didn't want me to struggle financially, as they have. Never would I have imagined that this career stuff would be more of a journey, than simply a destination.

True, I graduated from engineering school, and started working as an engineer. However, the work doesn't stop there. And I feel that path is still not chosen, yet. Having got a college education, I feel has been the major step in opening up many doors to career opportunities.

This is just the beginning, and I am so thankful that my parents were such great role models and guided me on the right path.

Career: Practical or Dreamy?

Last night, I went out to dinner with my girl friends after a relaxing spa date. 

We used to all work for the same company about 2 years ago.  Two of them, as entry level engineers - just out of university, and I was on a student internship.  Of course, they had health benefits at that time, and I didn't.  Now that I am working full-time as well, we all go out for spa dates, together!

Last night, was one of our last spa dates.  :(

One of the girls found a job somewhere else (which did not include these benefits), and another one was going back to school!  

We got to talking about our careers, our relationship lives, etc.  

One of the girls was going back to school to persue another undergraduate degree - in psychology.  This took my by complete surprise, since it seems like a topic that is opposite to what she had studied and worked in.  Did I mention that she graduated from engineering?  

Anyhow, we were all first generation Canadians, with middle eastern, or Asian background.  It was little surprise that we would choose something that was practical to study, so that we can get a good job afterwards.  

I, of course, am no different.   Engineering was something that was practical to me.  Math and science were topics that I found interesting and easy to grasp.  So after 5 years, here I am.

Working in the field that I had wanted to be in.  And yet, I can't say I am completely satisfied.  Even though it's what I wanted to be in, it's not exactly what I picture or envisioned.  If that makes any sense.

Do I want to be walking parking structures for the rest of my life, and chasing leaks?  Writing specs?  Contract administration?  Methinks not.

However, on those bad days, I keep reminding myself that I need to take a step back, and look at the bigger picture.  Where I am right now is a great place to learn.  It's a wonderful place to start out.  I have a lot of great teachers, and mentors at my work place, who are all willing to give me a chance to learn.  I need to take a advantage of that.  And then take it from there. 

I keep reminding myself, that I won't get anything out of this experience if I don't put in all my effort to learn as much as I can.  Then, after that, I can decide where I want to go from there.

I guess that's the big picture.  Sometimes, it's hard to keep that in mind, when I'm doing the mundane tasks.  

I know nothing is written in stone.  But, if I had a chance to pick something else.  Something where I didn't have to worry about finding a job afterwards, I'm not sure if I would pick engineering.  Or maybe, I would take more electives in something else.

I think back to high school when I had to pick my university program.  How is a 18 year old supposed to know what she wants to do for the rest of her life?  And I was someone who researched and looked into my field?  My decision was based on a balance of what was practical and what I had interest in.  I wasn't able to take the leap to choose something that wasn't, in my eyes, practical.  

One of my cousins studied Fashion Designing, and spent two years.  Only to end up working odd jobs waitress-ing, and eventually ending up at her dad's company as an admin clerk.  That scares me.  I'm not sure if I could deal with that very well, if I were in her position.

Meh.  Just something that's on my mind.

Did you choose your career based on practicality or dreams???

Organization!

So, I've been trying to make some changes in my life.

I think I've gotten over the initial hump of "oh-my-god-I-am-no-longer-in-school-even-though-I-have-been-for-the-last-seventeen-years-of-my-life" crisis. Yay, me :)

I have gotten to the point that I am not that overwhelmed with my life. I have great sisters whom are my best friends and can talk about anything to. I have a great job right out of university as a consulting engineer. I am really liking dating a really great guy. I am on good terms with my parents. I have great friends, keep in touch even if we're far apart, and see my close ones as often as I can. AND I just paid off all my student loans.

Life is good, and I'm enjoying.

I think I was initially overwhelmed with everything because I felt like I had to know everything. Where I will be in 10 years from now. Even 5 years from now. From everything in terms of career, investments, house, car, boyfriend/significant other, etc etc.

Now, I know, and have convinced myself that that is silly. People are constantly changing. I am constantly changing, and to think that I can see into the future is silly. And also impossible.

So, instead of worrying about the future, I am just going to enjoy the present, and set some short term goals for myself.

A couple of areas of development, I am looking to improve are how I look at my finances and taking care of my body.

Not that I spend frivolously or eat very poorly. I think that is next to impossible with the way I was brought up (the Asian cheap genes). But I would like to know more about finances, track them and see where my money is going. Then, I can see if I am really spending my money where I want to be. I want to learn about investing, and do some of it myself. I would also like a place to record my journey along this path

I have a passion for food, and think it might be a good idea to have a place where I can record my cooking and eating woes (and triumphs). I usually only cook about twice a week, since I'm living on my own.

And even though, I can do all that on one blog. I would like to experiment with having 3 blogs. One dedicated to my weekly journal of my personal thoughts of my life (that's this one). One that is similar to a personal finance blog. And one more for my recipes and adventures dining out.

I like to have things organized into categories, and I'm actually really excited to get started on this little project of mine. I will post the links when I get them up and running :)

Wish me luck, and feel free to check them out!

Friday at the Office

J.D.: You know there are Star War fans in the office when ...

Me: ... when your boss is pretending to be a Wookie.

2 Things that Happened at Work, Today

1) My boss and I broke into a church.

Me: I've never broken into a church, before.

My boss: Well, technically, we didn't break in. The back door was left open.

We were supposed to meet a priest at a job site. He wasn't there. Which leads us to occurence numero deux.

2) A priest lied to us.

My boss: Father, we were at the church at about a quarter after three today. We didn't see you.

Priest: I was there.

[My boss's inner monologue: Liar!!!]

...And this is what keeps my job interesting.

Moi = Employed Engineer

So, it's official. I am now employed. Just signed the offer yesterday and sent it off to my future employer.

Wow. This is a new chapter in my life, and I'm excited.

The interview process and job search wasn't too grueling, and I ended up with an all-expenses-paid trip to the west coast over my spring break (interview with another firm). Yay! I got to spend a week seeing Vancouver, Seattle and Portland - for free. Like I mentioned before, I love to travel, but tuition has been taking a toll on my finances (aka broke).

The firm offered me the position with a pretty good benefit package, however, the location was in Portland, instead of my first choice - Vancouver. I liked Portland during my time there, though I wasn't sure if I'd be ready to make the move to live there. It was very different than what I was used to in Toronto. More of a small town feel to it. It was an internal turmoil - of taking a big step into the unknown. Or not.

After much pondering, I decided not to take the job. Sigh.

I interviewed with 2 more companies - who had offices on the west coast, but also in Toronto, as well. We spoke about opportunities of traveling and it looks promising. I'm excited to start in July.

Until then, I must graduate first. So, time to read over those notes. One last time. Exam in 2 hours.

Photo source: Alberto_sechi