A Moment with You

A love story. As honest as it can be.

Brought to you by the guys of WongFu Productions. If you haven't seen this YouTube clip on "Yellow Fever" by WongFu Productions, then you've been living under a rock. Honestly.

So I've become quite a fan of these guys over the past term or so. Especially during my procrastination for exams. Their clips are so funny, and these guys are just so creative. Did I mention that Phil Wang and Wes Chan are also pretty cute? You be the judge.

So when they came out with their first full length film, A Moment with You, I was just dying to watch it. My friend, J., was so sweet, she bought the DVD for my birthday! I finally watched the movie a couple weeks ago with my sister. I loved it.

So basically it's a love story that's realistic. I think that the movie definitely lived up to it. The scenery was beautiful. The actors were pretty good (of course, we're not talking about any Oscar award winning performances.) But most of all, I loved the way they portrayed relationships. Something that even many big budget Hollywood films fail to capture.

Relationships. Sometimes they are so simple, and sometimes they can be so complicated. I think it's safe to say that most of us in our twenty-somethings have brushed past "love" or some relationship with the opposite sex. Whether it be in the form of a long term or short relationship, a crush, a friendship we might of thought would be something more, or anything in between. We've all probably had some sort of baggage, and we've probably all been hurt before.

I think this film captures those doubts, hopes, joys and sadness so beautifully.

I'm going to briefly comment on the two main characters.

Meet Arthur. Your typical nerd. He's 24 and he's never had a serious relationship before. He meets Alice, who is pretty, smart, spontaneous and fun. They start hanging out and he starts to develop feelings for her. But he also knows that she still thinks about her ex-boy-friend. He's not sure if she likes him as more than a friend and he's afraid to believe that a relationship with Alice could really be a possibility and take the chance.

Meet Dustin. Your typical outgoing guy. Unlike Arthur, he doesn't have any trouble meeting the ladies; however, the only girl he can think of is his ex-girlfriend, Lauren. All he can think about is the mistake he think he's made by breaking up with her, and what might have been. What if she sees that he's changed? Would they have a chance to be together? Randomly, at a party, Dustin bumps into a close friend in college, Natalie. They start hanging out, and she develops feelings for him. Yet, Dustin is so caught up in thinking about his ex-girlfriend that he doesn't even see his opportunity to give him and Natalie a chance.

We get glimpses into some of the characters' past, into some of the crucial moments which shape who they become. We watch how they struggle to come to terms with their past. With themselves. With each other. With the present.

Although I love the entire movie, two scenes really stood out for me. The honesty and raw feelings of the characters portrayed was just beautiful.

SPOILER WARNING HERE.

My first favourite scene. Dustin meets up with his ex-girlfriend when she comes to visit. He desperately wants to tell her that he's changed and he can be a better boyfriend: he wants another chance. He doesn't want to just drift away from her life. Going against his better judgment, he spills his guts to her when they exchange good byes. This is their conversation.

D: Do you people just come and go so easily?

L: Sometimes that's the way it has to be.

D: And what if you don't want that someone to go?

L: It's not always your choice.

D: Is it ever worth trying?

L: I guess it depends on the situation.

D: And us? .... I don't want to be a stranger to you.

L: You aren't.

D: I will be... If something doesn't happen right now.

L: What can happen?

D: I can show you that I'm different.

L: That's not always enough, Dustin. I'm different, too.

D: I think about the moments that pass us by. And only certain ones stick with us... As time passes, everything we go through, loses it's realness. They all just become stories. And memories... Lauren, I don't want what we had to become another story. I want it to be real.

L: What we had was real. It will always be real to me.

D: I guess it will just be a matter of time, then.

L: Dustin, I promise. You will never be a stranger to me. I won't let it happen. I can't let it happen. What you showed me. What you were to me. No one can replace. I'm not afraid because you are a part of me. And I can never lose that.

D: Thank you. I love you.

L: I know.

***************

My second favourite scene. Arthur and Alice had a wonderful date at the art gallery. They are talking and the night ended suddenly when she got a call from her ex-boyfriend. Alice doesn't come by in a while. Arthur thinks they have gotten back together. He is sitting in the park where him and Alice used to frequent when Alice comes by. They go for a walk and share this conversation.

A: So. Uh. Where have you been lately? Haven't seen you around at all.

Al: I guess I just got a lot on my mind.

A: Hey Alice. Ummm. I don't really know if it's my place to say it. But I'm glad that things worked out between you and Jeff. I know that you guys had something special together. It's all good.

Al: Arthur...

A: I guess what I'm trying to say is that I hope that we can still be friends. Because you are a nice girl. No one's really made me feel special before.... So....

Al: We didn't get back together.

A: How come?

Al: What would make you think that we did?

A: Well, I knew that you were still thinking about him, a lot. And that night, when he called, I guess, I just thought that you went over to his house. You guys talked. And .... I hadn't seen you in a while so I just thought you guys worked it out, and got back together.

Al: That's a lot of things to assume.

A: But, when we were hanging out, you did miss him, though, didn't you?

Al: Yea. I did. [pause] But the more time I spend with you. The more I realize that my happiness did not depend on him, anymore.

A: What happened that night?

Al: Well, you're right. I did go see him. And we did talk. But I realized that night. That what I was missing was a memory. And memories are nice to have, but they are not real, anymore. What's real is that Jeff and I are different people, now. What's real, is that I'm here with you. And I like it. I think we found something good here, Arthur.

A: Yea. Me, too.

*************

I think we can all relate to someone or a moment in this movie. The traits and experiences of the characters are so typical that they can apply to almost everyone. At one point or another, I think we can all relate to Arthur's shyness, Dustin's confusion, Natalie's frustration or Alice's attachment. These moments are so normal -- they can happen everyday -- and yet, so extraordinary when shared with that special someone.

People are complex. People are not perfect. Same with relationships. It's how we are able to deal with it which determines the outcome. Some are worth fighting for. Others, you just learn to move on and cherish all the good parts. How do you know which is which? Who knows. But one thing is for sure.

Life is made up of moments. Little moments. Moments which define who we are. Moments which can make us a little more happier. Or moments which make us sad. A hug. A kiss. A tear. An ending. A new beginning.

Making Time for Committment

I'm not the type of girl to whine, cry and consume a tub of Haagen Daz after a break up. OK. Given that I've really had one break up in my entire life, I may or may do it in the future.

However, during my last break up, I balled my eyes out the day of and the next day. After all my tear ducts were as dry as the Sahara Desert, I proceeded to occupy any spare moment of my time with stuff. That wasn't too hard to do, since I was taking 5 civil technical electives, T.A.-ing a first year calculus extra help session, and doing research on a side for a professor in Building Science. Fun stuff. In my spare time, I hit the gym, and hung out with my girlfriends, guy friends, whoever. Just so that I wouldn't have to go home, and face an empty house with my mind full of thoughts.

I remember after my last exam, I didn't want to go back home cuz my roommates were still studying for their exams at the library. I was so afraid to face my house alone. To be alone with my thoughts. In my room, where Almond had broken up with me.

I ended up tagging along with the guys and watched them play Playstation II. Or III. Or XX. Who knows. I would rather do that than go home. I ended up falling asleep after a couple rounds of some fighting game.

Then I went to Singapore for an exchange term. Needless to say that I was pretty much busy for 4 months. I also really enjoyed just meeting new people, going out and trying new things. I realized that trying new things was something which I was lacking. I mean, I spent so much of my time juggling between studying, family, and Almond, that I really didn't spend that much time on me. So I started trying new things. Stepping a out of my comfort zone. A little at a time.

I came back from Singapore and was more outgoing and more active. I started swimming with a friend (sometimes with the hot swimmer). I took salsa lessons with a friend. I started dragon boating. I played volleyball on the class team. I went out on dates. I went out clubbing. Basically, I just went out. It was a lot of fun, and I really enjoyed it. I met someone who made me excited to date again.

We were in the same salsa class, and he was one of my buddies' roommate. He was good looking, easy going and what my friends and I call, "a charmer." Let's call him Gelato. More on him later. Maybe.

I have never been a very active person. However, just being a little more active, not only gave me more energy, but it made me feel better about myself. I also liked the way my arms, shoulders and legs were more toned. It felt good. So I tried to keep up with swimming and running.

Just this year, I realized that I have indeed become quite busy being active. To plan a date would actually require planning ahead, because I kinda had to slot the guy into an appointment time.

It wasn't until lately that there has been someone I'm excited to see. Let's call him, Haagen Daz. I actually want to make some time to see him. It's a nice feeling. But also nice to know that my days are full without any guy, and I could be perfectly satisfied, as well.

I'm not about to throw all my plans out for Haagen Daz. We'll just take it one day at a time, and one date at a time.

I'm still going to stay active, and do all the new activities I have come to love doing -- which was previously used as time void filler. My new activities include soccer (I like indoor more than outdoors), volleyball, dragon boating, swimming and running. I also want to keep up with squash, too. I can't do this all at once, obviously, but a few activities at a time. Maybe I can even kill two birds with one stone and do some of the activities with Haagen Daz.

After all, the first time we met, we were both sweaty and sandy from playing each other on beach volleyball. So much for first impressions, eh? He still looked good. Trust me.

You, me and a coffee table.

I ran into my ex. Carrying a coffee table. At midnight. Last Thursday. Wearing the one shirt which he bought me.

Life's funny, isn't it?

A little background info. You can also read about him here. And here.

So after we parted ways last June, Almond and I haven't talked. It's not so much that I hated him or anything -- I'm not a hateful person, and can't really imagine myself hating anyone. Much less him. I was just really disappointed. I needed my space.

He's pretty much left me alone since, and didn't try to push the "friendship" thing any further. At least, he knew where I stood on that matter.

This February, I sent him an email wishing him a happy birthday. (Facebook birthday wishes are so impersonal.) It went something like this.

Hey Almond,

Just wanted to wish you a happy birthday, or as you like to call it - HDay! What are you up to lately? I hope everything is going well for you and your family, and Candy*, too. :)

Take care.

All the best,
Des

* Candy is Almond's family poodle. She's getting quite old now -- she was 14 last time I saw her. She's adorable.

His response was the following.

Hi Des,

Thanks for the HDay wishes! I've been working as an engineering consultant, actually started not to long ago and ended up working in Toronto.

What have u been up to? u decided to do a masters or join the work force? I hope school is going well, enjoy it while it lasts.

It would be nice to see/meet you over hot chocolate (i don't like coffee) some time if you feel comfortable, otherwise don't worry about it.

Kind Regards,
Almond

We e-mailed a little back and forth. It was really nice to just catch up on his life for the past little while. We never got a chance to meet up before I left for my graduation trip, and figured we'd meet up after that. He told me he starting working not too long ago -- this February.

He is working in Toronto, and doing general computer consulting. He also just bought a house, and was moving in June. Just so happens that his house is really close to where my new job would be. Life's crazy like that, isn't it?

Anyway, after I came back from my graduation trip, I suddenly had a change of mind. I was really happy where I was in my life. In a way, I was afraid that if I met up with Almond, it might some how mess up the balance I had worked so hard to achieve in my life. So, I just told him that I wasn't ready for it.

Hi Almond,

Hope all is going well for you.

I just started work a couple of weeks ago, and it's been so far so good. I'm really liking what I'm doing and the people who I work with are amazing.

Anyway, right now I am thinking it's best not to meet up, but I hope your summer is going well.

Cheers,
Des

His response.

Hi Des,

I'm fine. Sound like you are doing well.

Glad to hear work is good at that you enjoyed your trip for the most part.

Regards,
Almond

So that was when we last corresponded. In July sometime -- so, not too long ago. Since I knew that he was living in the same area that I was, I wasn't expecting to run into him, but wouldn't be too surprised if I did. I thought about the different possible situations that may occur.

1) At the mall
2) On the subway (on the way to or back from soccer)
3) On one of my walks or runs around my neighborhood

Little did I know that last Thursday was going to happen a little differently. I have been looking into buying furniture for my new apartment. My friend suggested I try Craigslist for some gently used furniture. So far, it's been pretty good.

I went to see this musical after work with some friends from work. It was hilarious, by the way. I highly recommend it. Never have I seen so many guys at a musical audience, before.

So after the show ended -- about 10PM -- my friend, Y. and I went to pick up a coffee table on our way back to the subway. It was a gently used IKEA coffee table. $30. Awesome.

So we took it apart and took the bus back to the subway where her car was parked. I was also supposed to look at one of my old colleague's sofa (he was just trying to get rid of it) since he was showing people the next day, he told me to just come later Thursday night (after my musical) to see it.

Here is the fun part. Y. and I lugging my coffee table from the bus to her car. It wasn't too heavy, but bulky it was. After getting through the doors, we head towards the elevator. Then I hear a husky voice call my name. I thought it was Y.

Almond: Des??
me: What, Y.?!

I stop and turn around.

Y.: I didn't say anything.

I look up. It's Almond. I thought we just looked at each other, but according to Y., we were just staring at each other for a while. I finally found my voice.

me: Hi! How are you doing?
Almond: Hi. I'm good. How are you?

me: I'm good.

Awkward silence.

inner monologue: Oh. My. God. I'm carrying a coffee table. Hmm. And I'm wearing the ONE shirt he gave me. Shit. Hmm. Do I look good? I think so. My hair behaved today, and I have my contacts in. Oh. Should I introduce Y.?

me: By the way, this is my friend, Y. Y., this is Almond.

They exchange awkward hello's.

me: Sorry. I have to go. We're supposed to supposed to be somewhere right now.
Almond: Sure.
me: It was nice seeing you. Take care.
Almond: You, too.

We make it to Y.'s car. On the drive, I tell Y. that was my ex.

Y.: So that's why it was so awkward.
me: Yuppers.
Y.: That's funny. You have so many adventures. First we're looking at a coffee table and taking the bus with the said coffee table at 11PM at night! AND we run into your ex.
me: That's my life. Full of adventures. Just dandy.

I figured Almond was probably wondering where the heck I had to be at midnight that I couldn't even stop and chat. And carrying a coffee table. I felt a little bad for brushing him off. I didn't mean to. So, I figured I'd clear the air.

Hi Almond,

It was nice bumping into you last night -- as brief as it was. (Though, I hope you don't usually work this late. :P)

I know we haven't seen each other in a while, and it would have been nice to chat a bit. I didn't mean to brush you off -- sorry about that.

I was actually running super late meeting a friend I was going to buy some furniture off of. I'm just starting to furnish my new apartment that I'll be moving into in September (as you could probably tell with the coffee table).

Anyway, I hope you have a great weekend.


- Des

His response.

Hi Des,

It was nice running into you to. No need to apologize. I realized you were busy when I saw you walking at a fast pace carrying your things.

I hope you had a great weekend,
Almond


So. I think things are cool between us. We're grown ups.

I guess the thing I was most afraid of when facing him was that it would mess me up. That my emotions would just end up in a big mess, and all the work I've done would be gone. Funny enough. That's not what happened.

It was nice seeing him. But that was it. I no longer had a longing for him. It was almost like seeing an old friend. Almost.

I watched a movie a few nights ago with my sister created by WongFu Productions called "A Moment with You." Beautiful movie. Heartfelt. Touching. Realistic. Relatable. The quote that came to mind when I look back on that oh-so-awkward-run-in is this.

I think about all the moments that pass us by and only certain ones stay with us.

The moments between Almond and I. They will always stay with me. They will always be a part of my memory. They will forever be a part of me. He will always be a very special person to me. I will forever be thankful for all the beautiful and sad moments we shared. But our moment has passed. The realization is both sad and happy. It's like taking a step forward -- knowing that I can never go back.

Pretending to be a Grown Up

That's right. I'm pretending.

So this thought kinda struck me the other day when I got really excited rifling through the fliers -- they had Sunsilk shampoo and conditioner on sale at my local supermarket for $2!!! To top it off, they even had Oil of Olay body wash for only $3! I couldn't wait to hit the store and stock up for the next year or so. Do you know how much this stuff usually costs?!

Then I realized how excited I was about this. And it was kinda pathetic.

I feel like I'm playing house --but for real, now. The only difference is that I can't just leave the toys behind when I'm done and start another game. I also have to buy everything in the said "house," and it costs money. Sometimes, lots of money.

It's funny, I thought that grown ups knew "everything." By "everything", I mean they know most things and generally understand the world around them. In other words, they have answers, which I, never had.

However, now I think it's different. Obviously I am a "grown up", now, and have been for a while. Even though I still feel like a kid inside. (You know, feeling lost and confused most of the time.)

Now, I think being a "grown up" means knowing that you will never know anything for sure, but being able to accept that fact. It's also trying your best, and know that it's all you can ever ask of yourself, or anyone else.

Sometimes, it's about being brave when all you want to do is curl up in a ball and hide away from the world for a while. Sometimes, it's about being strong when the people you care about are hurting too much to stand on their own. Sometimes its about having the faith of a child and just taking a chance.

In the mean time, I'm just going to continue pretending to be an "adult" and get excited about toiletries going on sale, then stocking up for the next year or so. Buy some furniture for my new basement apartment, ogle over bags and shoes I will not be able to afford (yet), and munch on my favourite desserts.

Me and Dating

You know those couples that have been together for god-knows-how-long. They met in high school and have been together ever since. Other people just envy them and the love they share.

I was one of those couples. Until I wasn't.

Now, for the past almost-two years, I have been navigating the dating world as a single gal. I've gone on my share of first dates, and then some. Some awkward. Some fun. Most of them were with genuinely nice guys. A couple with some jerks.

As a single girl who had her heart broken, the thing I was most afraid of was not being able to feel that way, again. The butterflies. The excitement. Being able to trust someone, again.

Rationally speaking, I will find someone. I am intelligent, kind, witty, out going, physically active -- I'm no model, but I think I'm fairly attractive.

But in the time that I have been alone, I think I have been working on the relationship that I had been neglecting while I was in a relationship with Almond. The relationship with me. When you've been together with someone for so long, there is no doubt that you don't always put your needs, first.

For the past almost-two years, I came first. It was a good feeling. I was able to grow as an individual, instead of as part of a couple. I was able to learn lessons of love. Lessons of forgiveness. Lessons of moving on.

I always thought that I would be the type of girlfriend who could maintain ties to their exes. I thought that to be able to spend such a significant amount of time with someone and share so much with that person, you would want them in your life. I was wrong.

I didn't know how much hurt that person could cause. Even though I have forgiven him, I think that's all I can do. Being friends would be asking too much of myself. I know my limits, and I am just protecting myself.

Besides, would Almond be worth explaining to my new boyfriend for someone to accept? I'm not so sure. When he wanted my friendship, part of it was to see if it would lead "anywhere." I guess that's the part that I'm skeptical about. He didn't respect me enough to be honest about his intent of a "friendship."

I know who my friends are. And, unfortunately, he is no longer one of them. He will always be an important part of me. But he is in past now.

I'll save the post for my disasters of first dates for another time. Oh lordy, there were some really awkward ones.

For now, I'll just say that I'm a little excited about someone. Someone who brings a silly grin to my face when I think of them. Someone whom I can spend hours talking on the phone with about nothing in particular. Someone who I can tease and they can keep up with their own smart remarks. Someone who I look forward to seeing sometime this week.

Case of the Ex

Another name for this post can be Chocolate Almond Croissant: Part II. This is going to be a long post.

So, I thought that now might be a good time to recap on what happened after Almond and I broke up. This is more for me to get out of my system, since I have never been able to bring myself to put this to paper. It also puts it in perspective.

After Almond and I broke up, some weird stuff happened between us. First, I just was so angry and hurt that I ignored him for a while. It felt like ages and ages to me, in reality, it was about a month and a half.

It was terrible and I am so thankful and grateful for the support of my friends and family. They are the ones who sat with me in the washroom as I cried (I’m not much of a crying-in-front-of-other-people person), bought me Hagan Daaz ice cream, made me peanut butter and chocolate chip brownies while we sat and bitched about my ex.

Might I add that the first Christmas after a break up is horrible. The guy actually had the nerve to send me an email that was so blaming and guilt ridden to make me feel bad for trying to move on with my life. I have never been able to read that email, again. Basically, he hacked my email and read every one for the past month since I refused to talk to him. Then, he had the nerve to tell me that he has been miserable while I have been out with guys.

So what if I started to go swimming with my hot swimmer friend who wanted to give me lessons. It’s no longer any of his business, right? It's not like I rubbed it in his face. He went through my private stuff. Anyway, he made me feel like crap and very guilty. And so, I agreed to meet up with him.

Mistake numero uno. I know. On hindsight, I should not have gone. But sometimes, it's nice to know that I tried to give him a chance even when he didn't deserve one. Sometimes.

We met for coffee. It was obvious that stuff between us wasn’t over. We talked, laughed. And I honestly forgot about all the shit he put me through. We did a little more than kiss. It was good. Better than good.

He wanted to get back together. I said it was a bad idea. I was going off to exchange in Singapore and I knew how he is long distance relationships -- terrible. I would be waiting for his calls, and they wouldn’t come. I would get annoyed and it would just be a damper on my trip. I wanted a break, but we’ll see when I get back. The time apart would give us both some time to figure things out.

We talked, emailed, msn-ed, while I was in Singapore. And a part of me was looking forward to seeing him when I got back to Canada. Who knows, maybe we’ll get back together. I had gone out with a couple guys (more to come on that) and I just didn’t really feel anything. Maybe Almond and I had something special. Who knows?

Almond was graduating that spring, so he went on a 6 week grad trip after his exams. He didn’t’ get back until June, and that’s when we met up.

Perhaps my expectations were held too high. See, I thought that he would realize that he made a mistake. In his frustrated and depressed state of endless job hunting, home problems, school projects, figuring out life in general, and a relationship, he lashed out at the one thing that he could depend on.

I mean, it’s not like he was going to write an email to Microsoft demanding a job or interview. He had no control over that. The way I see it, he saw me as a factor he could control. I didn’t expect us to get back together, or anything, but what I really wanted was an apology for how he handled the situation. Besides, I was always there for him. For five years. I guess he thought that I would fight for us, no matter what.

Backtracking.

Almond said that I didn't fight for us. But I did fight for us. Our break up devastated me. I asked him to reconsider what he was doing, even though I was hurting like hell right after it happened.

I told him he was stressed out, and I was not the cause of it. None of it worked, and I was hurting too much to keep trying. Obviously, he wasn’t taking care of me anymore, and I needed to take care of myself, now.

I had troubles concentrating on studying for exams, I was so afraid I would just barely pass. Every time I looked out the window, my mind spun, as to what went wrong and what I could have done differently.

Was I too bossy? Was I not needy enough? Maybe I should have put up with more since he was going through a tough time. I asked myself so many "what if" questions.

I realize, there comes a time when you have to give up the fight. I think that time comes when the other person has already given up – or expects you to want the relationship to work more than them. Both are bad, in my books. That was the situation I was in.

I later learn that what he wanted to happen was for me to ask for us to get back together, again. That would show him that I cared about us. Seriously. In fact, he said that, if I had theoretically been the one to break up with him, he would have asked me to get back together. Of course, because that would’ve have shown that he cared. Right. This made no sense to me whatsoever.

I told him that if I had broken up with him, I would not expect him to ask me to take him back. I would want him to move on. And for the record, we’re not in elementary school, anymore. Who plays such immature games? Honestly. I felt like he was a completely different person. The man, whom I loved, was replaced by a twelve year old with a big ego. Damn it.

Fast forward.

After Almond came back from his graduation trip, we met up. I'm not going into any details, but basically, it seemed like he put no thought into it.

He didn't feel bad about the crap he put me through, or for acting so childish. He still insisted on the same things -- that I should've fought for us. That I should have asked to get back together instead of trying to move on. That I was wrong for trying to move on. That I was wrong to want to need my space. etc etc.

He made it sound like I owed him a friendship just because we were together for 5 years. Like I was being selfish for not wanting him in my life until I get myself back on track. It was really frustrating.

For some reason, I still thought about giving us a chance. I told him then, that if wanted to try, I was willing, but this is the only chance he's getting. Because if he's not taking this chance, I've obviously wasted more than enough time on him.

Then he gives me some crap about how we just couldn't be together. That we are just fundamentally wrong. I asked for examples.

Honest to god, I'm not lying when I tell you he used these 2 examples.

1) When I went to Booster Juice one time, I got him a strawberry banana shake. He said he didn't like banana and that I should've know that. I apologized and said I forgot that the flavour had banana in it. He kept whining about how I should have known, and that I really don't know him, if I got him banana. Then, I got annoyed and told him if he didn't want it, then don't drink it. So basically, I should not have gotten him banana. Because the guy doesn't like banana.

2) When I first move to my new place, I gave him the wrong directions to get to my house. I have a really bad sense of directions, but also, roads in Waterloo do not run parallel or perpendicular all the way. They wind and curve and do crazy things. So, needless to say, he didn't make it to my place until after a very big detour. He was biking and he was tired and sweaty and I felt terrible. It was an accident. But that was the second example he gave me.

Go figure. Guys can be such fucking idiots. Seriously.

I need a margarita.

** Despite what the bunny says, I've been able to get past this. I really don't hate him or anything. I just don't think it's necessary to talk or pretend to be friends, since I can't really trust him as a friend. I only wish him the best. Those were some really great times we shared, and I wouldn't trade them for anything, but it's also time to leave the past in the past, and move on with my life.

Still, it doesn't hurt to put on Daughtry's Over You, right now. :)

A "Guy's Bed"

I just realized that I have been sleeping in a "guy's bed" for the past few years of my life.

First, let me explain what I mean by "guy's bed."

des's definitions (with ideas taken from a post by my bloggy buddy, SO@24)

guy's bed: a bed that is functional. Most likely has a maximum of one pillow -- despite it being larger than a twin or single size bed. The thread count is most likely at a minimum -- whatever was on sale at Zellers or Wal-Mart at the big back to school sale.

girl's bed: a bed that is not only functional, but also comfortable and pretty. There are at least 2 pillows and probably a couple more "throw pillows", at least one (cute and furry) teddy bear, sheets are soft and silky -- at least 800 - 1000 thread count. The comforter probably comes in a matching set to the pillows and sheets. Not only is it a place to catch some zzz's, but its also a little slice of heaven.

So, now that I am a young, working professional. I am ready to buy my first piece of furniture -- which, for your information, is going to be a bed. I love my sleep, so this is going to take some research and investigation. I am determined to sleep in a "girl's bed", by the time I move into my new apartment in October. With my many soft and comfy pillows and matching sheet sets.

Ikea. Here I come. We're going to be seeing a lot of each other this summer. :)

Thoughts on Love Abroad

OK, I still haven't gotten pictures from the girls yet. Darn it. I can't believe how busy everyone is. But they will come soon. In the meantime, I will bore you with my reflections of "love" that I had while one this trip.

It's funny the thoughts that come into one's head while traveling. You have so much time it seems, and your mind wanders, whether you like it or not. It could be on a long train ride, waiting (yet again) for a delayed flight, drifting along the Nile, watching a sunset, climbing a mountain, watching a sunrise. You get it.

I guess one of the thoughts that hit me really hard was: "I can be happy again with someone new". I know. That took long enough, eh?! When I imagined myself -- perhaps traveling with a significant other -- the image was no longer of Almond. In fact, in wasn't of anyone in particular (most of the time) -- just a mysterious Mr. X.

Now, I truly believe (not just convinced by rationality) that I can really find someone who would love me for who I am, and I can love back with all my heart. It's taken me a while to get to this point. I've taken a look back on my relationship, and realized that I have indeed grown significantly as a person and as a (potential) lover and partner.

The most important part being that the relationship I have with myself is a lot healthier. I have more of an idea of what I want in my life, and more importantly, what my values are. I have learned to take a little more risk, but also learned to let things slide if they don't work out. I have learned to forgive myself, and other people, of mistakes or miscommunications, or whatever, but also know that it's alright to feel hurt and angry for a while.

Carrie Bradshaw once said,

Later that day I got to thinking about relationships. There are those that open you up to something new and exotic, those that are old and familiar, those that bring up lots of questions, those that bring you somewhere unexpected, those that bring you far from where you started, and those that bring you back. But the most exciting, challenging and significant relationship of all is the one you have with yourself. And if you find someone to love the you you love, well, that's just fabulous.

Before I left on my trip, Almond had emailed me and wanted to know how things were in my life and wanted to get together. I felt obligated to see him, but I said I would let him know when I get back. After weighing the pro's and con's, I feel it may be better not to see him right now. I'm pretty sure he has a new girlfriend, and though I do feel happy for him. I don't think I'm ready to see him. Plain and simple.

I'm happy where I am in my life right now, and I'm afraid seeing him will mess things up. I get to be a little selfish, right?

I'm BACK!!! :)

It feels great to be home -- always the best part of any journey.

I have been keeping a travel journal and have done pretty well with keeping up with most of it. I still have to add the last days of Egypt and the Germany parts. Other than that, my adventures in the land of the sun (Egypt), has been well documented with all of our quirkiness and stories.

First things, first though. I must do some serious laundry, make some phone calls, eat up some yummy home cooked food, watch the food network, pick out something decent for convocation tomorrow ...

So updates will probably be up in the next week or so. Unfortunately, my camera was stolen in the markets of Cairo, so I will need to get some of the photos from my travel buddies. So stay tuned!

I thought it would be neat to share a list of the things I missed while traveling.

* My family
* Laundry with a laundry machine instead of by hand-- painful
* Veggies and rice (my family bet on which one I would miss more)
* My music -- no iPod for 5 weeks
* Singing aloud to tunes
* My laptop
* Cooking (can't wait to try out my spices from Egypt!)
* Wearing shorts
* Seeing signs in English
* Timmie's everything bagel with herb'n garlic cream cheese (yummie)
* Fruits
* My bed
* Conditioner (my poor hair has been baked in the desert sun)
* Bubble baths

The above is in no particular order.

Ok, enough time wasted. Must do laundry. Ciao!

Count down to Egypt and Germany begins ...

I'm about 48 hours away from leaving my house for my graduation trip.

I don't like having long count downs, you know - 17 weeks until [enter super fun activity here]. Not that there is anything wrong with that, it just makes me feel old. Like my life isn't really worth living until then. 48 hours, I can deal with not doing much except running around like a maniac to prepare for my trip.

So I'm a travel junkie. This started when I had a work term in Boston (first time I stepped foot off of Canadian soil!), and then my 4 months of exchange in Singapore consisted of various adventures in Malaysia (Kuala Lampur and Taman Negara), Indonesia, Thailand (Bangkok and Krabi), Vietnam and Cambodia. Major, major dosage of traveling for myself, a newbie. Then a couple of short trips, with my family to Cuba and Montreal last summer. Tres fun.

Traveling felt much like having my eyes opened for the first time to all the wonders I had no idea existed in the world. I felt so naive and ignorant. So insignificant, yet realize it is people -- individual much like you and I -- who shape the history of our world. Since it was my first time traveling, I was learning a lot. I was lucky to have friends who have had some experience traveling before, and they were equipped with Lonely Planet guides and first aid kits, and other essentials.

I also learned a lot myself. I learned that I loved learning about different cultures and also about where I came from. My dad was born in Vietnam and my mom was born in Cambodia. I was blessed to have the opportunity to visit their homeland.

I learned (not just believed) how fortunate I was to be born in Canada and have so many opportunities (freedom, women's rights, education - to name a few) that many people can only dream about. I saw -- first hand -- how fortunate I was to be given the opportunity to be multi-lingual, and how there are so many languages I want to learn. I also learned how much culture is reflected in the languages of different countries. In my feeble attempt to learn Vietnamese.

I learned that no matter where I go, no matter how many cool sites I see, the best part of journey is coming home and being able to share it with the people I cared about. My family and friends.

I also learned a lot about myself as a traveler. I learned that I am definitely not a country hopper. I would much rather spend more time in one single country and immersing myself in it's culture than seeing many countries in a short amount of time. It feels unjust for me to spend only a couple of days in country and claiming I have "been there."

I also don't like to herded around like cattle. You know those, like those Chinese tours, where they stop at a city and you have 15 minutes to explore. Then you're herded back onto the bus for another 10 hour ride. Yea. Not my cup of tea. It feels unjust to the country I am visiting and to the people who are visiting.

So unless the place I'm traveling to is unsafe without a guide (ie. trekking in the Himilayas, Central and South American (?) ), I usually try to stay away from tours. Another exception is when I want to learn a lot the history, especially at historically significant sites. I can only get so much from staring at rubble :)

I will keep updating this blog with stories of my travels, so check back if you are interested. In the meantime, here are some of the things on our itinerary:

Watching Egyptian Belly dancing. Maybe take some classes? So beautiful!
Visiting the port of Alexandria. Named after Alexander the Great from the Greek Empire.
Of course, the Pyramids of Giza. I have to ride a camel here.
Visiting the Western Desserts. Ever heard of sand surfing? What else would you do in a dessert, right?Diving in the Red Sea. I heard they have awesome wreck dives. Good thing I know how to swim this time around!
Visiting Mount Sinai. Isn't this gorgeous?
Visiting the mosques and museums of Cairo.
Visiting Luxor and the Valley of the Kings. Hello, Ramses the Great and King Tut. King Tut was actually a very insignificant figure in terms of contribution to the Egyptian History, but more to come on that later.
Of course, I have to ride a felucca along the Nile. This looks so peaceful and gorgeous.
_____________________________________________
Update: I just transferred some of my old posts (from my exchange term last year) of my travels to this blog. I also added some more pictures -- some mine, others googled. I also realize my grammar was not-so-good, so please bear with me. The links in this post link to the respective entries. Or you can do what I would do, and just look at the pictures! Enjoy =)

Rant post on the ex

It's spring, so isn't love supposed to be in the air?! Love, where art thou? Ok, forget love. How about just "like" - in that mushy-butterflies-in-your-stomach kind of way?

So, there is more to the story of myself and Almond than Part I. More to come later (in Part II). The later bits aren't so nice.

I don't understand why it is so hard for me to move on. It's not like I haven't gone out and dated. I've met some great people. But it seems so complicated. Was "love"or even "like" always this complicated?

When there was chemistry, the guy was not so great. When there is a great guy, there seems to be no chemistry. What's a girl supposed to do?

To be honest, stepping into the working world, I have no idea how to even meet new people. At school, you can meet people in clubs and sports. Is it the same in the working aka real world?

My ex doesn't seem to be having any problems in this department. I know I sound bitter when I say this. I don't mean to be.

Backtrack:

When we had our talk (after our "break") Almond was in a bad stage in his life.

He still didn't have a job. He had no idea where he was going in life. He sounded like a lost puppy who barely knew his own name. He said he was no where near being able to handle a relationship and could not bear to hurt me again. He said he wasn't sure when he'd be ready for one and thought it would be unfair to ask me to wait (damn right!).

I felt really bad for him. But I also needed time alone. It's hard for me to separate my emotions when it comes to him. So I asked him to give me time on my own. He had trouble understanding this. For some reason, he thought I was being unfair to him by "taking away" my friendship.

Fast forward:

A couple months after our talk, it seems he got over his fear of relationships pretty quickly. Go figure.

After that one didn't work out, he soon got into another one.

It's not that I don't want him to be happy. That's not it at all. I just wonder why it seems so easy for him to go from one relationship to another, whereas I feel like I'm stuck.

How come it's so hard for me to move on? It's not like I have commitment problems, right? Am I too picky? Am I protecting myself too much? Is it cause I haven't met the right guy, yet? Or wait - is there something wrong with me?

Facebook is a horrible thing. I used to think that I was mature enough to handle information about my ex, so I kept him on my "friends list." I stayed away from the FB stalking pretty well, but I crumble under the stupid mini feed. Grrr..... Damn you, FB!

Anyway, I realized today, that I am not that strong. Seeing my ex with his new gf frolicking at the beach is not something I can stomach. (I actually didn't see that picture, I saw a picture of my cousin's ex doing that. And realized that if it was Almond with his new gf, it is definitely not my cup of tea) My first FB friend deletion today.

Life goes on. Exhale.

Wedding bells.

No, they are not my wedding bells. I would require a man for that, first.

I am referring to the wedding bells of my bff from high school, H. Though it's been tough, we've kept in touch throughout college and grab lunch or dinner whenever I'm in town. On my birthday, she called me to wish me happy birthday, and also tell me of the good news.

H. is of a traditional Indian background, and even in our high school days, our views towards relationships differed somewhat. She believed in arranged marriages, whereas I did not feel so strongly about it. I believe they work for some people, but I don't think it's the thing for me. H. was getting an arranged marriage.

This took a little time for me to digest. But of course, I support her 150% and told her that whatever she needed me to do, I would. So, for the next few months (after I get back from my grad trip) I will be super busy, planning, organizing and running errands. I'm actually really excited.

There seems to be a million things that need to be done. She's super organized, and we're going out for dinner to talk about what I need to do later this week. I think I need to get one of those day planner thing-ies.

Best part is. I get to wear a sari. They are so elegant and beautiful. I hope I will be able to the sari some justice.


Who knows. Maybe I'll meet some hot brown dude at the wedding ;)

Daikon Cake... yummm

All my life, I have known this dish to be "white carrot cake" until last night. This is one of my all time favourite dishes to order at dim sum. It's a great comfort food, and really delicious.

Anywho, this weekend, Daikon was on sale at the local supermarket (4 for $1) and some we bought a bunch. Last night, my mom decided to make this Daikon cake, and teach me how to do it, as well.

If you know me, I'm a 30 minute kind of cook. One of the things I learned about Chinese cooking is that there can be a tonne of preparation, and me, well, I'm all about the short cuts. There were no short cuts about this dish, so I was a bit skeptical if I would ever tackle it on my own.

Turns out the dish was quite simple to make, though it did take some time. I think I can do it.

This is my mom's quick recipe. (I have to check the packages for sizes)

Ingredients:
2 medium sized Daikon shredded
1 package of rice flour
1/3 package of wheat flour
sugar, salt, pepper, sesame oil and green onions to flavour
stirred fried mushrooms, dried shrimps, sausage (whatever you like)
water
oil

1. Peel and shred the Daikon. Cook in boiling water.

2. Mix rice flour, wheat flour, and seasonings together. Slowly add water to mixture and mix until it is a creamy consistency. Add a little oil to mixture.

3. Pour in creamy mixture to boiling Daikon mixture and stir.

4. Turn the heat to low and continue stirring out lumps. Add in stirred fried ingredients and mix.

5. Transfer mixture to a well oiled pan and steam for about 40 minutes.

6. Serve "soft" or pan fried (must wait for it to cool overnight, first) with your choice of sauce. I like my dad's fish sauce with hot sauce.

I know the directions are rough, but I found another site with a recipe that seems more precise.

Though I still stick to my 30 minute meals, this will do for special occasions. :)

Photos: curiously ravenous

Why can't Dad cook!?

Just wondering.

Chocolate Almond Croissant: Part I

My ex boyfriend.

I guess I should take this moment to back track a little and give a bit of background information on my past relationship.

I was in a 5 year relationship with my ex-boyfriend. I'm going to call him Almond (after the first dessert we shared, a Chocolate Almond Croissant from Michel's)

We met in high school. He was a year older and his locker was next to mine. We were in the same French and Finite class. I thought he was really cute. He was also smart. He answered most of the bonus questions in my Finite class. He was also a little shy, and he looked put together.

I went to a Catholic high school and most of the guys always have their dress shirts all wrinkly, untucked and wore their pants pretty much around their ankles. Almond's shirts would be ironed, and tucked into his dress pants (but not in a dorky way). He always wore a belt, and dress shoes.

Anyway, we started talking and hanging out a lot. I've never dated anyone before. I don't even think I had a guy like me and tell me before. It was all so new and it felt so good.

He was a real sweetheart. He'd always walk me home after school, even though he lived 5 minutes away and I lived a good 15 minutes away in the opposite direction. We'd just walk and talk. There was so much to talk about. He was a great listener and we shared a lot of interesting ideas.

He'd walk me home even in the winter. Winters are not so nice in Toronto. And this made it even sweeter. Though I did feel guilty on the cold days, and told him not to. In the spring and summer, we'd walk through the park and sit on the bench, or in the grass - just talking. I was really happy.

I remember when he first held my hand. We were sitting on the park bench near my house. Our usual stop. I remember his hand was so much bigger than mine. His nails were always trimmed. I rested my head on his shoulders, and he put his other arm around me. Still holding onto my other hand.

We just sat like that for a very long time. It's cliche to say, but I can still remember every moment as clear as day.

We confessed our feelings to each other. He told me he thought I was beautiful. No one had ever told me that before. Parents don't count. I told him I have no idea how to kiss someone, and was scared to mess it up. He said he didn't know either, but assured me he really wanted to kiss me. Then we kissed.

The kiss was basically us pursing out lips together for about 10 seconds. It felt like forever. lol. I guess I was expecting fire works or something to happen. But it was perfect. It was sweet. It was so simple. I could never forget that kiss.

Then he walked me the rest of the way home. With a couple more pecks here and there, since that's all we knew about kissing at that time. We were so giddy and so happy.

I remember one of the most thoughtful gifts I've received was a business suit from Almond on our second Christmas together. Yes, Almond bought me clothes. He was brave. He thought I could use it for my upcoming co-op interviews. He also said that he wanted to see me in it. Guys. :)

He took my sister, S. with him so she could act as a model. He didn't want to give away the surprise. He ended buying me a size 6 or 8. I was a size 0. lol. But it was so sweet. We just got it exchanged, and he liked it even more when it fit properly. I call it my lucky suit.

Fast forwarding a little. Almond and I had a beautiful relationship. He went off to university a year before me, but our relationship grew stronger. Talking on the phone, I still have the letter he sent me on his first week of school. He was out at movies with some new friends. And thought of me and missed me. When he was back in his dorm, he wrote me a letter when an email would have sufficed. I loved it.

I went up to visit him a few times, and met his new friends. They were all really nice, and I keep in touch with them to this day. Anyway, after I left, he told me his friend (who hadn't had a girl friend before) asked him, why he held my hand all the time. lol. He answered, "Because I like to."

Then I went off to university. We were both in engineering at the same nerd university, so we got to see each other during school and even lived together for a while.

For our work terms, we either went off to different places, or stayed in Toronto when there was no where cool that would hire us. He spent four months in Silicon Valley - Santa Clara, California and I spent four months in Boston, Massachusetts. He was very encouraging of me, and I tried to be also of him.

Long distance relationships are hard, but we pulled through. We both learned a lot about ourselves, each other, and about compromising.

Then, things started to not go well in Fall of 2006. He got really stressed with having to find a job after graduating, and I still think that is one of the main causes of our break up. It's hard to say.

He was really unhappy, and playing more and more video games. They were his escape from a bad day at work, or lack of responses from his job applications. I remembered I would go over on Friday nights, and fall asleep waiting for him to finish "this quest." WoW. You know what I'm talking about, guys.

I tried to be understanding, and I even tried to help. But his response to my suggestions, were often, "you don't understand." I guess I didn't.

I would get angry when he would break promises or plans because he had to finish his computer game quest. Again and again. I would get angry, then feel bad for getting angry because he was going through a tough time. It's a very vicious cycle.

One day not long after, I was just really upset. I called up my girlfriend, J. and confided in her. I was crying. Then Almond called. He could tell I was upset and wanted to come over. I said no, it's not a big deal. He came over anyway.

He asked me what was wrong. I didn't want to say, because it was him. It's not that I didn't tell him these things, I just didn't want to get mad at him, again. Then he asked me if he was making me unhappy.

That was a hard question. Lately he was making my unhappy, but he made me so happy before. I just thought we were going through a rough time. After we got through this hurdle, I was sure things would get better.

He didn't agree. He was silent for a while.

I asked him what he was thinking. He replied, "About us." I asked him if he was thinking about breaking up. He didn't answer me. Silence can be a horrible thing. But it is an answer.

I started to cry. I buried my head in my pillow and hid under the covers. I told him to leave me alone.

He tried to hold me, and kept apologizing. He said he didn't want it to end this way. I kept pushing him away. Literally. I just wanted him to leave me alone. He said he wasn't leaving until I got up.

Somehow I got up. I don't even remember what I said or what he said. I just knew that when he was about to leave, I kept telling him not to go. Like he was walking out of my life. His last words were, "[Des] I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you."

That was the worst day of my life. This is the first time in almost 2 years that I have the guts to write about it.

Exhale.

My Dad

I was reading another blogger's post on her dad, and thought, what a great time to write about mine!

My dad. A loving and supporting husband, father, uncle and friend.

I am the oldest of his three daughters. Yes, he always gets teased about being out numbered by females, but don't you worry. My dad can stand his ground.

Growing up, my dad hasn't always been the same person to me, and I haven't always been able to relate to him the same way. My parents have always been very strict, and when I was little, I would be afraid of my dad. I dreaded when he found out about my mischief.

My dad has this presence that can be very intimidating. Just ask my ex-boyfriend (lol....).

My dad was never the type to give me money to go out and buy new clothes or electronics. In fact, I didn't own a cell phone until I could afford my own.

My dad taught me to value money and work hard for it. I had part time jobs during high school, and have paid my way through (most of) my university.

My dad did not take my family on vacations to exotic beaches and islands, we were too poor for that. My dad took us to CNE and Ontario Place (with those free tickets, of course), Wasaga Beach, the zoo, and camping every summer without fail.

Every weekend, we would drive over to the local library and take out a stack of books. Though I'm pretty sure he'd rather stay at home and watch tv, instead of running around with 3 crazy little girls. He's a trooper.

My dad didn't take us to fancy restaurants for birthday celebrations, ie. no Chuck E Cheese or Discovery Zone. Instead, he'd whip up his specialty fried noodles with chives and garlic, a dish of steamed fish, and my mom would steam a cake. I was embarrassed as a kid, and would only invite my best friend over.

Only recently, we start going to restaurants for these special occasions. It wasn't that great. We quickly told my parents that we preferred celebrating at home. Though, it's a little sad that we didn't realize how great we had things until we're older.

Even though we didn't do poorly in school. My parents would always go to a parent-teacher interview if we had less than an A+ on midterms. Seriously. Talk about pressure. But now I know they did it because they cared. Though, they did have high expectations. Asian parents. **shakes head** =)

Through the years, my dad went from being someone I feared, to someone I really respected. Now, he is someone I can also talk to and relate at the same level. Much like a friend. We have come a long way. I can tell him what's on my mind, and I think he can, too.

I can talk to him about my break up, and he understands my pain. But also encourages me to learn from it, cherish the moments and move forward.

I tell him about my fears of stepping into the working world, and feeling like I have to be a grown up, when I have more unanswered questions and thoughts than answers. He reassures me that things will work out just fine.

I tell him of my thoughts of moving to the west coast. He tells me he'll miss his little girl, but will be happy to support me if that's what I want to do.

There's a million other things I could write, but then, this post will never end and I'd probably end up with tears on the keyboards (therefore, cementing the imminent death of my laptop), and you'd have fallen asleep from boredom.

My dad. The greatest, yet most humble man I know.

I'm so lucky to have a such a great role model.

You can't cheat your first kiss

For a kiss to be really good, you want it to mean something.
You want it to be with someone you can't get out of your head.
So that when your lips finally touch, you feel it everywhere.
A kiss so hot and so deep you never want to come up for air.
You can't cheat your first kiss, Nicole.
Trust me, you don't want to.
Because when you find that right person, a first kiss, is everything.

One of my favourite quotes from Grey's. Alex Karev can have his moments. This is one of them.

I can recall every moment of my first kiss. Sigh. That'll be another post.

Whatever... It matters.

I'm trying not to censor myself with this blog. I think it's hard for me. To some extent, I like to please people, like most of us. So here goes, with something that's been bothering me for the past little while.


Back track to when I was wee little, say about 13 years old. In a conversation with my dad, he asked me for my opinion, or what to do (about a topic which I don't recall).

Dad: Des, what would you like to do.
Des: I don't know dad. It doesn't really matter.

Pause.

Dad: Des, this is something that I wanted your opinion in.
Des: [shrugs] I really don't know, dad. It doesn't really matter.

I wasn't not trying to be one of those rebel teenagers who show no emotions or cares. It's just that it didn't really matter either way.

My dad takes a deep breath.

Dad: Des, you might not realize this, but by shrugging off my question you are disrespecting me. [You know how Asians are so keen on showing respect, right?] It shows that you don't really care or give 2 hoots of what I'm saying. This is a matter which is important to me, and it would nice if you stopped, and thought about it, and told me your thoughts. That's all.

My dad always has these little "life lessons" for us as kids. Sometimes I agree, sometimes I disagree. This is one of the times, I agree after I've experienced it.

Fast forward to this week. I was trying to plan my grad trip with B., and asked my friend if she wanted to join.

Instead of saying yes or no, she just shrugged and said, "I don't know. I don't really care."

I flash back to that conversation my dad and I had. Even though it probably wasn't said with bad intentions. At that moment, I believe I felt exactly the way my dad did.

I know that not everyone is certain of what they want to do (travels, jobs, money, etc etc). I've asked a few people who might be interested in the trip, and I don't need a concrete answer. Just a thoughtful and honest one. I usually do get straight answers (ie. yes, I'm interested, but I am constrained by ......... , or, no, I'm not interested.)

I was trying to plan a trip. I was spending money, time and effort. A lot of time, money, and effort. I don't like going into things half-heartedly. The "I don't care" really felt like a slap in the face. Like it didn't matter. At all.

I guess, like my dad, I just wanted a straight up answer. Like father, like daughter.

Can I see your proof of ID, please?

My last few days as an undergraduate student are nearing. Last night I went out to a bar with my sister and some friends for drinks. It wasn't planned, so I didn't have all my cards with me, including my driver's license.

Waitress: Can I please see ID from everyone?
Me: Darn it. I don't have mine with me. But, I am in my last term of fourth year. Do you have to see it?

[Note: I was the oldest of the group. The legal drinking age in Ontario is 19, and I am turning 24 next week. I'm pretty sure I don't look 19, though I wouldn't mind if I did. ]

Waitress: No, I'm sorry. I can't serve you alcohol.
Me: I write my very last undergrad exam on Monday. Does that count for anything?
Waitress: Sorry.
Me: That's ok. Can I get a glass of water please. With lemon.

Great. I sounded like a desperate, underage alcoholic.

It was still a fun night. We watched Nip / Tuck and TLC's What not to Wear on the booth's little TV's (which are probably meant for sports because we had to blast the volume way up and lean in to catch any part of the dialog).

I think I'll miss it when I'm not ID-ed.