You know when you first meet someone, or when you meet the right someone. You're in what I like to call " La La Land." Sometimes its for a short amount of time, and others, it's for a longer amount of time.
When I was with Almond, it was for a long time. My friends thought that I didn't even notice other hot guys. Which I did. But it just didn't matter. When I liked "Gelato" (more on him later), I was in La La Land, too. But with Haagan Daz, I'm afraid it has died. And it's been less than 3 months.
Now, I know that it's not supposed to feel the way it felt when I was with Almond. A naive, high school giddy girl. Now it's different. I know what it's like to be hurt and I am more protective of my heart. But I believe I am still supposed to be in La La Land.
I guess I just got over the initial excitment with Haagan Daz and when I got to know more of him, he just didn't seem that attractive a person.
A couple things triggered this. Partly because I was on PMS. Partly because I'm seeing his true colours that I might have not noticed when I was too busy being excited.
Last weekend, I stayed with my parents on Sunday night because it would've been too late to take public transportation to my apartment. So I had to make the 2hr commute (gross!) to work on Monday instead of my usual (15 - 30 minutes). Since I told Haagan Daz, I would give him a call, I did.
me: So, I figured that I'll just stay over at my parents' place. It's late.
H.G.: Oh, really? Well, I could've come and picked you up at the subway and drove you home. I don't have to get up early.
me: Oh, really? [thinks about it] No, that would be pretty far for you to drive. I'm just going to stay here, but thanks for offering.
H.G.: Oh. Well. I wasn't really going to drive you. I just figured I'd offer. It is pretty far.
me: Oh. Okay.
my internal monologue: So, why exactly is he telling me this? Awkward.
Same thing happened on Friday when I was working downtown and we were getting together afterwards.
Why does he tell me that he didn't really mean the offer? Like he has to make that clear to me, or something.
We talked on the phone a couple times during the week. I got bored. Caught myself reading, "Bitter is the New Black" by Jen Lancaster. Then put it down. Then nearly fell asleep hearing him talk.
Then, I noticed things that just bugged me.
Like how he answers the phone with , "Yeeeeeeeellllowww."
I asked him about that later. He told me he gets it from Homer Simpson. Nice.
Then on Friday, I just noticed that we don't have that much in common. We don't have the same sense of humour. Stuff that he finds funny, I just find awkward.
For instance, we're cooking tacos. He's browning the ground beef. Then he starts "mooo-ing". Like a cow.
After the first mooo,
me: So, you're moo-ing like a cow.
H.G.: Moooooo. [again]
After the first moo, he moo's again. For added effect, I suppose. Does anyone find that funny? I just thought it was him trying to be funny, but it was just awkward. Or was it just PMS?
Now, the last bit.
Haagan Daz has an anxiety disorder, where he gets really really nervous when meeting new people. He feels sick, literally. He told me about it, and I did appreciate his honesty. But then he talks about it. A lot.
We were supposed to go up for a Dragonboat festival on Saturday, and he was going to meet my friends. I wanted to see my friends' inputs and see how he interacted with other people. Needless to say, he was really nervous. Then, he told me this. Which, I just thought was disgusting. Disgusting. Not funny. At all.
H.G.: I get really nervous, and I don't want to throw up all over your friends. Like, this. [pretend handshake with the air] Hi, I'm Haagan Daz and its nice to meet you BLUUUURRRRRPPP [makes a throw up noise and accompany gestures]
H.G.: And hi, so-and-so. I'm BLLLLLLUUUURRRRRPPPPPPP. [throw up noise and gestures]
Honestly. Excitement is over. So. Over.