Good Morning, Goose

So I'm sure you've all heard of the rooster wake up call, or even experienced it first hand - like myself. However, have you had a goose wake up call, specifically by a Canada Goose? No? Lucky you. Yes? Welcome to the club (high five!).

A little background on these geese. On my campus we have A LOT of them roaming around. I've even seen some stick around for the winter! Honestly, these are the most ego-tistical lot of geese I've ever met. They think they own the place.

They poo everywhere. I mean everywhere. They make their nests in the most crowded places, and hiss at everyone who walks by. One year, one couple made their love nest at the entrance of our school gym. Yea. My school ended up building a fence around them to protect the students. Hilarious.

Oh! Another time I almost tripped on one because it was walking in front of me and refused to get out of the way. Apparently, I was supposed to walk around the goose. My bad. They are rude little critters, aren't they? Or maybe I'm just full of myself, being a human and all.

Anyway, back to this morning. So at 8am, Mr Canada Goose (let's call him CG, for short) decides to perch himself at the roof of my low rise apartment and perform his mating calls for the next hour. Maybe this location allowed for him to have a maximum honking range, I'm not sure (the geese on my campus are smart like that). This location was also right outside my window.

I was not happy with this rude awakening. I opened and slammed my window shut, hoping the noise would scare CG off. No such luck. I should've known.

I end up getting up, go out onto the balcony, try to yell at it and wave my arms. CG just stared at me, with a taunting look, knowing I couldn't reach him.

Now, don't get me wrong, I usually love animals, and would never want to hurt them. But when my sleep is disturbed, my priorities are a little blurred.

I go back into my apartment. Break off two cloves of garlic, and stomp back out to the balcony. I hurl the garlic at CG. No, I didn't hit him. Although I did have pretty good aim. It whizzed by him. It did not scare him off. He gave me a look that seemed to say, "Garlic cloves. That's the best you got?"

Defeated. By a goose.

Photo source: justgettingstarted